You are in the bookstore and this cute girl is next to you, flipping through magazines. After a few moments, strike up a conversation and you’re not sure if he’s flirting or just being friendly. How can you tell if she is interested?
# 1) Does he make eye contact with you? It’s an added bonus if he looks you in the eye and smiles!
# 2) Has he touched your arm or brushed you? If it is trying to enter your space, this could be a possible sign. If you gesture back and she leans toward you, it’s a pretty safe bet that she’s thinking what you’re thinking.
# 3) Do you have tattoos that can give you away? Many lesbians will have some type of “pride” tattoo or other symbol that can give them away. Look at it closely, it may be very subtle or it could be a big rainbow, but you won’t know unless you look closely.
# 4) Do you have any jewels that can give you away? A rainbow ring, a necklace, a labrys is an older symbol of empowerment for women and could be a clue to their sexuality. A thumb ring is known to be an indicator of bisexuality, and lesbians in a committed relationship sometimes wear a ring on the middle finger of the left hand. It is not the traditional wedding ring finger, but the longest finger on the hand is the one to look for.
# 5) Does he play with his hair when he talks and smiles at you? This is often the way a very feminine woman flirts. Look for subtle changes in her face, her expressions, and her eyes. The movement of the hair, along with all of the above, is almost a safe bet that you are being flirted with.
# 6) Casually mention your “last girlfriend” and wait for her response. If there is no expression of surprise, no obvious change in his demeanor, and he still seems to be flirting with you, he most likely is.
# 7) Mention the name of a local gay club or bar and ask them if they have ever been there. If she’s familiar and says she’s been there, then you’re as good as gold, my friend. Ask her!
# 8) If you’re the sassy type and you’re somewhere near a coffee shop or booth, ask her if she’d like a drink and offer to get it. If she willingly accepts your invitation, sits down and talks to you, chances are she is as interested in you as you are in her.
# 9) During your conversation, place your hand on the small of her back, very casually, and direct her towards a door, a chair, anywhere. If she moves easily with you, it is her subconscious that allows you to take control of the situation and signals her desire for you to do so. At that point, you should be sure to ask for her number so that you can “call her sometime.”
# 10) Just go out there and ask if all else fails. She seems interested and you are not sure. The only way you’ll know is to just go out and ask. You might say something sweet like, “I really don’t want to offend you, so please take that as a compliment, but I’d love to meet a girl like you and get to know her. At any time, you could give me your phone number.” and have lunch sometime? “You’re giving her a compliment and dating her at the same time. She will tell her if she’s interested by accepting or rejecting. She might even say” I thought you’d NEVER ask! “
Good luck with your dates. It is not easy to meet quality people, especially in public. More and more people are turning to online dating, but it’s certainly more fun to have that initial spark from across the room and find an excuse to reach out and strike up a conversation. Maybe they will exchange glances and both will play hard to get it? The relationship dance is fun, if you allow yourself to enjoy it. Don’t let your anxiety stop you from having a little fun. Flirting is good for the soul … even if the girl turns out to be straight.